What does he do when you put him for a nap (and he does go to sleep)? What do you do? Have you tried extending his nap by setting a sleep window?

If you could give us a bit more information on this then we can make some suggestions.

For sure the poor napping and the early wakings aren't helping each other - the aim would probably be to get him to have a short nap fairly early on in the morning to keep him going and then a proper nap post lunch and he would then be likely to drop the short nap (eg 20-30mins) once he is sleeping better.

reply by DT-Elisabeth - 5 weeks ago

Hi, thanks for getting back to me.
He's had a totally consistent nap routine since our consultation with Wendy: nappy change, story, cuddle, put in cot & play same piece of music. So there's no doubt it's nap time! He's always been changeable about actually going to sleep - sometimes goes off v easily but often chats for a while, sometimes cries on & off. We never go back in to him unless it's been over about 45 mins & it's clear he's not going to go to sleep - which has happened increasingly recently.
His naps have always been different lengths every day. Generally quite short which was ok(ish) when having 2 or 3 per day but not with one! Also his sleep cycle seems to be 25-30 mins, I understand most babies it's 45 mins? So he'll often wake at the half hour. Always leave him at least 10 mins (unless he's very upset) but he rarely goes back off. My experience of leaving him any longer is that he gets more & more upset but doesn't go back to sleep.
Thanks for your help.

reply by sleepy4580 - 5 weeks ago

Are you putting him down for more sleep after his 6.30am BF (you mentioned the BFing was giving you all a lie in)? If that's the case, it's almost certainly a major factor in the early waking. The solution would be to carry on keeping him in his cot til 6am then get him up, take him downstairs, give his BF there & start the day. It could take a couple of weeks to see an improvement so stick with it.

If I've got the wrong end of the stick altogether let me know & we'll review things again.

reply by Mentor-Sarah - 5 weeks ago

No no it's just that I BF him in our bed both at bedtime and first thing in the morning hence the lie-in aspect... I never get him up before 6, then it's BF about 6.30 then get him dressed and downstairs for solid Breakfast. I put him down for a morning nap still on days at home at 9am ish. He just has one nap these days at nursery.

reply by sleepy4580 - 5 weeks ago

Although it takes lots of willpower, it's much better to get him up at 6am, take him downstairs, give his BF there & start the day. By feeding him in your bed, it's still possible he's viewing it as more of a night feed than a daytime feed & his brain therefore "expects" a night feed, increasing the chances of early waking. If he's fed downstairs, his brain wakes up for the day & it helps to set his body clock for a regular wake up time of 6am or later. Early waking often takes several weeks to solve so you'll need to make the change then give it quite a while before you know if it's making a difference I'm afraid.

Will he fall asleep in the car? If so, I'd recommend letting him have a short nap in the morning (wake him after 30-40 mins if he doesn't do so naturally) then go for a drive in the car whenever he shows tired signs after lunch. Once he's in the habit of napping at that time for a few days, go back to trying to get him settling in the cot for the second nap at a similar time to when you've been driving in the car. It'll help to create a napping habit at that time & also give him the benefit of more reliable daytime sleep which might in turn help the early waking.

reply by Mentor-Sarah - 4 weeks ago

Hi there. I've decided to stop the morning BF this week (will continue the evening one for a few weeks). So we'll start the day downstairs, offering him cow's milk instead. He's always refused to drink both formula and cow's milk in the past which is the main reason I've continued to BF but we'll persevere. I'm hoping as you say that starting the day differently will help with the early waking.

Unfortunately he doesn't reliably fall asleep in the car. It varies. He often takes a very long time to go off and sometimes doesn't sleep long. He always wakes up immediately the car stops.

In the past few days we've experimented with putting him down for 1 nap at 11/11.30 and he has 3 times had a decent nap of 1.5 hrs - 2.5 hrs (just one day when he only had 20 mins but that was definitely due to teething). I am desperately hoping he'll get in to this pattern and his body will get used to napping for a decent amount of time in the middle of the day. If so we'll push it back gradually until it's an after lunch nap (as even if he has 2 hrs at this earlier time he is v tired by bed time). Sadly he is a changeable wee thing and we can't rely on his having enough.... any tips???

Many thanks as always

reply by sleepy4580 - 4 weeks ago

Hi, what you've said above all sounds good, it looks like you are making progress! The best tip is to stay consistent with what you are doing as it is abviously working, don't give in with the morning milk and keep persisting with the naps and like you suggest he will get into the routine of having longer.

reply by DT-emily - 4 weeks ago

Oh dear what a difference a day makes. This morning he woke at 5am and although we left him till 6 he didn't go back to sleep. So by about 8.30am he was shattered. We put him down for a nap and he slept 1hr45 (until 10.45). I HATE waking him so I let him sleep. However we knew he then wouldn't go down for an afternoon nap in his cot so we went out for a long walk as he sometimes sleeps in the backpack. He didn't, and ended up having 30mins in that car on the way home 4-4.30pm, which of course has affected bed time. Should I have limited his morning nap? What on earth do I do when he wakes SO early???

reply by sleepy4580 - 4 weeks ago